"One day at a time--this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering."
Ida Scott Taylor
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Getting Wings Can Be Painful
My daughters and granddaughter
I must admit that I've been a little sad lately- no it's more like a lot sad lately! I'm really missing my daughters and my grandchildren. (oh and I miss my son-in-laws too). How do you do it when you live states away from your children and grandchildren? I'd really like to hear from you on how you cope with this. I'm most of the time, a very positive person, but this is an area that I cry to God about very often. I'm sure He understands, because He misses us when we are distant from Him. Maybe someone else out there feels this way too. I'm going to get more vulnerable today than I've gotten before in a post, and I hope it helps someone else that is reading this.
I remember, not that long ago, when my husband and I were raising our children and praying for their futures. It was our prayer that we do all that we could to prepare them for when they needed to spread their wings and fly out into being and doing all that God had planned for them. To live their dreams and be happy. They are doing this and we are so proud of the beautiful women they've become. So when I say that I'm sad, it's not because life didn't turn out for them the way we hoped it would.
-mute my music on sidebar so you can enjoy this beautiful video and song-
I guess I just have trouble "letting go" and I always have. I think it stems from feeling lonely as a child. Both of my parents have passed away, so I feel I can share this with you. I loved my parents but learned to be a little adult very young. My mother developed a mental illness in her twenties and my father wasn't around very much. When they were together, my siblings and I saw a lot of fighting and saw things children really shouldn't have to see. We took care of ourselves and of one another. If the doctors would have known then what they know now about mental illness, I'm sure my mother wouldn't have had to endure so much pain. In spite of all her trials, she had a beautiful smile and a very compassionate heart. When I turned 12 years old, my parents divorced and my grandparents were given legal custody of me and my siblings. It was like heaven on earth living with them in my mind, because I finally felt secure under their roof. I call my grandparents my angels because they are the ones that gave me wings. Their love and encouragement and the Lord's love truly made an extreme difference in my life.
"Every experience God gives us, every person He puts in our lives, is the perfect preparation for the future that only He can see."
Corrie Ten Boom
So another part of my loneliness stems from having to leave my mother. When I was 39 years old she passed away with cancer. She was only 57 years old. It seemed to bring back up all the lonely feelings from my childhood again when she passed away. My father passed away about 4 years later. My grandparents have since passed away also. I guess I've had to grieve a lot over my life. When our daughters got married (10 weeks a part) and left the nest, then my husband started going to college in the evenings after his full-time job. I am so proud of him, but I miss him too. He graduates in December 2010!!!!!! Hallelujah!!! (I'm so proud of him!)
I couldn't say all that I've just told you about myself without also telling you that the Lord has been there with me through everything and still is today. When these lonely heart feelings come to me, He is the one who picks me up and gives me the spiritual hug I need. It's then that I can see, all of the blessings that I have been given and even blessings that have come from the trials and pain of my past.
I love this picture, don't you?
Okay, so if you've really stuck with me down to the
bottom of this LONG post,
I'm so thankful.
If you have some "missingyour children" tips
for me, I'm all ears!!
Truly, my friends, I will cheer you on as you learn how to Fly.......